·

Three Months in Southeast Asia: Our Honest Family Travel Round-Up

Three months. Four countries. A ridiculous number of meals, trains, buses, boats, Grab rides, swimming pools, markets, beaches, monkeys, friendships and more than a few moments where we’ve wondered what…

Three months.

Four countries.

A ridiculous number of meals, trains, buses, boats, Grab rides, swimming pools, markets, beaches, monkeys, friendships and more than a few moments where we’ve wondered what the hell we were doing. 😂

After Australia and New Zealand, we headed into Southeast Asia for the next chapter of our full-time family travels: Bali, Malaysia, Singapore and Vietnam.

We’d travelled in Southeast Asia before, so we weren’t arriving completely clueless about what to expect. We knew it would be hot. We knew it would be busy. We knew the cultures, food, transport and general way of life would be very different from what we’d experienced in Australia and New Zealand.

And that’s probably the word I’d use most when looking back on the last three months:

Different.

And that’s exactly what we wanted.

Different landscapes. Different people. Different food. Different cultures. Different ways of getting around. Different ideas about family and community. Different levels of chaos.

Some of it was challenging. Some of it was incredible. Some of it made us question our life choices.

But isn’t that what travelling is supposed to be?

So… which country did we love most?

If you forced us to rank the four, we’d probably go:

1. Vietnam
2. Singapore
3. Malaysia
4. Bali

But even that doesn’t really tell the story.

Vietnam was the standout for all three of us, but for completely different reasons. Poppy’s favourite place was Nha Trang. Nat fell for Da Nang. Mine was Ninh Binh.

Hanoi and Hoi An weren’t far behind either.

And actually, that might be the best thing I can say about Vietnam. We didn’t all come away saying, “That one place was the best.”

We each found somewhere that felt like ours.

Vietnam exceeded our expectations in almost every direction. The scenery was incredible, the people were wonderful and the food… well, we’ll get onto that.

Malaysia was a bit more complicated.

We were genuinely excited to get back to Kuala Lumpur after Bali and had some brilliant days exploring the city, including the Petronas Science Museum and the markets. But staying at M City, which was a little out of the way, meant we never quite got the same feeling of welcome we’d experienced on our previous visit.

That doesn’t mean we didn’t enjoy Malaysia. Far from it.

The food was fantastic, the cultural mix fascinating and Penang was a really cool stop.

And then there was Langkawi.

We absolutely fell in love with it.

In fact, we extended our stay and could quite happily have just moved there. The beaches, relaxed pace and wildlife were fantastic, and the dusky leaf monkeys were ridiculously cute.

Malaysia is definitely somewhere we’d return to. We’d just approach it differently next time, moving around more rather than using KL as such a central base.

Singapore was a completely different experience again.

We only had two nights and, frankly, the odds weren’t exactly stacked in its favour. We somehow missed our original flight, ended up on the back foot, stayed in a hostel with approximately zero soundproofing and then watched England lose a semi-final to Argentina.

So there were plenty of opportunities for Singapore to leave us with a bad taste in our mouths.

Instead, we came away really glad we’d gone.

The Gardens by the Bay light show was brilliant, we saw beautiful kingfishers and the Botanical Gardens — particularly the children’s area — completely exceeded our expectations.

We also felt incredibly safe.

Would we go back?

Probably not.

But we’re very glad we experienced it.

Bali was the complicated one

Bali is probably the hardest place to sum up.

There are things we absolutely loved.

The people have beautiful hearts. The sunsets were spectacular. And some of the food and breakfasts were genuinely wonderful.

But we also found Bali incredibly crowded.

Much more so than we’d expected.

Overtourism felt very real, and by the time we left, I actually felt quite sad for the local people. There’s something uncomfortable about looking around a place and realising that the tourism industry is simultaneously providing livelihoods and putting enormous pressure on the place itself.

And, of course, we’re part of that problem.

That’s the uncomfortable truth.

We arrived as tourists and contributed to the very system we were finding difficult to watch.

Ultimately, though, Bali just wasn’t for us.

Food poisoning brought our time there to an abrupt end after just 11 days of a booking that was supposed to last nearly four weeks. We ended up paying for 17 nights we didn’t use, had two doctors come out, booked new flights to Malaysia and then paid for additional accommodation once we arrived.

Financially, it was our biggest mistake of the three months.

But sometimes you’ve just got to get out.

We needed to get well, and we needed to move on.

Would we return to Bali?

No.

That isn’t a criticism of the Balinese people. Quite the opposite. It’s more a reflection of how tourism is being managed and how the destination felt to us.

Travelling Southeast Asia with a child

One of the biggest questions people ask us is what Southeast Asia is actually like with a child.

Our answer?

Really bloody good.

Poppy has embraced it.

She’s dealt with the heat, the crowds, the noise, the different food, the different beds, the different languages and the endless changes of scenery remarkably well.

And the transport has become an adventure in itself.

Motorbikes.

Boats.

Buses.

Trains.

Sleeper trains.

Grab cars.

We’ve experienced modes of transport here that feel completely different from anywhere we’ve travelled so far.

And Poppy has just rolled with it.

More importantly, Southeast Asia feels incredibly family-orientated.

We’ve never really had that feeling of:

“Oh, we can’t do that because we’ve got a child.”

Poppy has been welcomed everywhere we’ve gone. People constantly call her “baby” — in the wonderfully affectionate, completely non-creepy Southeast Asian way — and she seems to attract smiles wherever she goes.

There has never been a shortage of things to do.

And when there has been?

Pool.

Our long-term travel survival strategy has become remarkably sophisticated:

Book somewhere with a pool.

If all else fails, swim.

The friendships have been one of the biggest surprises

This is probably one of the things I’m most grateful for.

Through home education meet-ups in Malaysia, Poppy made friends who we then met up with again in Vietnam.

She’s met children from all over the world.

And we’ve watched her confidence grow enormously because of it.

There have been periods where she’s had children around her constantly and other times where, as a parent, I’ve worried about her going a couple of weeks without meaningful time with other kids.

That stuff can genuinely keep you awake at night.

But over a long trip, it balances itself out.

And Poppy has come through these three months with a much bigger confidence in herself and a growing understanding that the world is full of different people, different families and different ways of living.

That’s a pretty bloody good education.

The people might be what we remember most

If there’s one thing that has really stuck with us across Southeast Asia, it’s the sense of community.

Family seems to sit at the heart of everything.

We’ve been welcomed into people’s lives despite being obvious outsiders. We’ve shared food with families, had beers with people we’ve only just met and had conversations with locals wherever we’ve stayed.

And in Vietnam in particular, we’ve seen something that really affected us.

We’ve watched strangers help other people’s children while their parents were busy.

Not because someone asked them to.

Not because it was their responsibility.

Just because that’s what people do.

It’s difficult not to compare that with home.

I don’t think people in the UK are inherently less kind. I think life there has become incredibly demanding. Time is tight. Money is tight. Everyone is busy. Everyone is exhausted. And when you’re constantly worrying about your own family, your own bills and your own pressures, perhaps you simply don’t have the headspace to look outward as often.

Here, we’ve repeatedly felt that people do.

And that’s stayed with me.

Perhaps the biggest lesson isn’t that one culture is better than another.

Perhaps it’s simply a reminder of what we lose when life becomes so focused on ourselves.

And then there’s the food…

We’re foodies.

Three meals a day is the absolute minimum requirement in this family. 😂

So Southeast Asia was always going to be a winner.

The quality for the money has been incredible.

Malaysia gave us stuffed roti and cendol. Bali’s breakfasts were consistently something to look forward to. Singapore was fantastic but was also the obvious outlier financially.

And then Vietnam came along and we fell hard for bánh xèo — those crispy Vietnamese pancakes that we’ve even had a go at making ourselves.

Hoi An was probably our favourite food city.

But honestly, we’ve eaten brilliantly almost everywhere.

One of the things that’s surprised us most is just how much Poppy has embraced the food too. She’s been willing to try things, discover new flavours and eat the same local food as us.

And here’s the ridiculous statistic:

I don’t think we’ve paid more than £20 for a meal for three people, including drinks, since arriving in Southeast Asia.

Singapore excluded, obviously.

And that £20 includes several Michelin-recommended restaurants.

The quality-to-price ratio is just extraordinary.

The money side of Southeast Asia

Accommodation, transport and food have all represented exceptional value.

But there’s a very clear rule we’ve learned:

The more local you go, the better the value.

Anything specifically designed for Western tourists can easily cost twice as much — and sometimes three times as much — as something aimed at locals.

Homestays have been particularly brilliant.

We’ve had rooms, meals, service and even swimming pools for very little money.

Grab has also made getting around incredibly straightforward. We’ve used it extensively and haven’t felt ripped off once.

For trains and buses, we’ve generally stuck to reputable booking websites rather than trying to arrange everything through random people on the street.

And that leads nicely onto another common concern…

What about scams?

People talk about scams in Southeast Asia a lot.

Our approach has been pretty simple.

If someone randomly approaches us offering something?

No thanks.

If we’re booking transport?

Use an app or reputable website.

If we’re doing an activity or taking a journey?

Know what you’re paying before you start.

That’s pretty much it.

We’ve certainly had people try things, but we’ve never felt that travelling around Southeast Asia was inherently dangerous or that we were constantly being targeted.

In fact, we haven’t seen a single accident in three months despite some absolutely bonkers traffic.

There have been a fair few close calls, mind you. 😂

We didn’t drive ourselves anywhere because we simply weren’t confident enough with the traffic and road conditions.

Scooters are everywhere and easy to hire, but we’d strongly encourage anyone considering it to think carefully about whether they’re actually competent enough to ride in that environment and, importantly, whether their insurance would cover them.

Grab exists for a reason.

It’s not all been amazing

It would be very easy to write three months of travel as one enormous highlight reel.

It wasn’t.

Our biggest problem has been accommodation.

Some places simply haven’t been cleaned to the standard we’d expect. We’ve had bugs running around and, once you’ve seen cockroaches in your room, it’s remarkably difficult to forget they’re there.

We also massively underestimated how exhausting long-term travel can be.

Travel days are particularly hard for me.

The timings. The connections. The worry about whether everything will work.

Then you arrive somewhere new and you’ve got a different bed, different sounds at night, different surroundings, new things to explore and another completely different type of heat to deal with.

It all adds up.

You’re not on holiday.

You’re living out of a suitcase.

And there is a difference.

We also travelled far too bloody heavy

We’ve been carrying stuff around for eight months that we haven’t worn or used.

Eight months.

That’s embarrassing.

Eventually, after getting stung with our luggage at Da Nang airport, we finally admitted defeat and started giving things away to local people before heading back to Australia.

The lesson?

You need far less than you think you do.

Especially when you’re travelling slowly.

There’s always a laundry.

There’s always a convenience store.

And there’s absolutely no need to carry your entire previous life around on your back.

The biggest lesson: slow travel works for us

If there’s one thing this entire year has reinforced, it’s that slow travel is our belief system.

We don’t want to tick countries off a list.

We don’t want to arrive somewhere, photograph the famous thing, eat at the tourist restaurant and move on.

We want to live somewhere.

We want to go to the local café often enough that people recognise us.

We want Poppy to make friends.

We want to find the market.

We want to eat the food people actually eat.

We want to sit around and watch normal life happening.

And we’ve found that when we do that, we get far more back.

The best memories from Southeast Asia haven’t necessarily been the biggest attractions.

They’re the ordinary moments.

The people we’ve met.

The meals we’ve shared.

The friendships Poppy has made.

The ridiculous conversations over beers.

The little café moments.

The monkeys.

The food.

The sunsets.

The unexpected kindness.

That’s the stuff that sticks.

So, would we recommend Southeast Asia to families?

Absolutely.

But we’d also say something important:

Your experience will be different from ours.

We’ve met people who hated Nha Trang.

We thought it was paradise.

That’s the thing about travel.

There isn’t an objectively perfect destination.

There isn’t even an objectively perfect country.

What works for one family might drive another completely insane.

And that’s okay.

If you’re considering travelling Southeast Asia with your family, our biggest advice would simply be to arrive with an open mind.

Be ready to try things.

Eat things you’ve never eaten.

Get on the strange-looking bus.

Take the train.

Talk to people.

Accept invitations.

Get slightly lost.

Don’t expect everything to work exactly like it does at home.

And most importantly, approach it with open arms, an open mind and an open heart.

Because if you do, we’re pretty sure you’ll find something here that you absolutely love.

Three months later…

Southeast Asia has challenged us, exhausted us, fed us, surprised us and occasionally made us want to crawl into a hotel room and never leave it again.

But we’d do it all again tomorrow.

We’ve fallen hardest for Vietnam and would happily spend another three months exploring it. Thailand is now firmly on the list too.

Malaysia has left us wanting to explore more.

Singapore was short, expensive and surprisingly brilliant.

And Bali…

Well, Bali taught us that sometimes somewhere beautiful simply isn’t somewhere we want to return to.

That’s travel.

You don’t have to love everywhere.

You don’t have to pretend you enjoyed somewhere because Instagram says you should.

You don’t even have to agree with the people sitting next to you on the beach.

You just have to go.

Because somewhere out there is a place that will make you stop, look around and think:

“Yeah. This is why we travel.”

For us, over the last three months, we found quite a few of them.

Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *